![]() ![]() The lack of attention to detail is staggering. You can’t blame the characters for their lack of grace or dexterity, though, because most of their fingers are uniformly glued together – even in the cut-scenes. During the “nose pull” move, you will frequently reach through your opponent’s head entirely. Punches don’t feel very powerful and the hit-detection is awful. On either console, the graphics fare badly, with environments reeking of cheap Hollywood sound stages, unnaturally lit and as flat as Nebraska. The whole package just looks and feels low-budget. ![]() There are no traditional “save points,” which is thematically apt since nothing short of a miracle could have saved this tequila-inspired nightmare. Sometimes the game freezes, losing all data since the last time you played. If only the designers had stepped on the bugs in the programming. Other mini-games have Kyle stepping on bugs and rats, which are precisely as fun as they sound. ![]() Yeah, it was packaged with the first Macintosh and it still sucks after 30 years. How bad? One of them is that archaic puzzle game where you slide one tile at a time to assemble a picture. Story mode also includes a smattering of bad mini-games. The trailing camera isn’t set up for this, which results in Kyle alternately running and stopping in the retarded dance of the soon-to-be dead. In every boss battle, Kyle will run around in tight circles interminably, smacking at the bad periodically until he stops moving. The boss battles are actually challenging, but require a lot of dodging, at which Kyle is remarkably bad. This is nearly impossible to pull off against the bosses, which are the only battles that require more than your trusty button-mash. By timing your defense correctly, you can treat yourself to a slow-motion counter move. The game includes a promising ‘counter’ mechanic, though it turns out to be pretty negligible. The combo list is short and weak you’ll find more style in a high-school science teacher convention. You can also pick up enemies and throw them, but varying your tactics is just for style points. To knock out foes, you will push the quick punch button an awful lot, switching sometimes to the heavy punch button just to stop your thumb from cramping. The neighborhoods feel like elongated rooms, full of invisible walls and aimless pedestrians, more psychiatric ward than ghetto.īesides, a fighting game lives and dies by its fighting mechanic put that way, Streetwise mostly dies. We’ve seen this cheap “open” dynamic in brawlers before, most recently in another Capcom abortion, the terrible Beat Down: Fists of Vengeance. The city’s four neighborhoods are all very small, and while getting lost is never an issue, getting bored certainly is. The gameplay is “open” in that Kyle can take on missions at his leisure, buy crappy music at the electronics store, or take on unimaginative side-missions for cash to buy said music. If only the series would take its own advice.Ībandoning the two-player mode that made Final Fight fun in the first place, Streetwise’s main game lets you explore Metro City as Kyle. The game’s plot ironically sends the message that it was a huge mistake for Cody to try to go back and recapture his glory. What’s more street than a drug addict? One that is fifteen-feet tall and luminescent? Spare me. The premise of searching for your brother serves as a license to mayhem, but the dripping, undead mutants seem entirely out of place in this urban “streetwise” title. When you find Cody, he is doped up on a crazy new drug called “glow” that turns men into flesh-eating mutants. You search the city for him, pounding on faces as often as you can. Reminiscing about the good old days, your older brother absconds with some Mafioso types who promise that they can fix his knees. You hoist the fading torch of the franchise as Kyle, the younger brother to series mainstay, Cody. Contrary to everything you ever knew about the mindless joy of Final Fight, Streetwise tries to have a plot.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |